Pop a 98 Degrees CD into your Walkman, pull on your gauchos, and get that Von Dutch cap out of storage—we’re taking a trip down memory lane, party people. Where to, you ask? Why, we’re going to the Golden Age of Snack Food. You know the era I’m talking about: the late ‘90s/early 2000s. Without further ado, here are the top five absolute MOST ICONIC* nostalgic snacks that deserve a comeback:
*(According to the staffs of MyRecipes, Cooking Light, and Food & Wine).
Confession: I don’t think I’ve ever eaten a Dunk-a-roo. This is very off-brand for me, and I’m sort of ashamed to admit it. Everyone else between 20 and 40 years old seems very attached to them, though, so I’ve included them on this list.
If you, like many of my coworkers, desperately miss the dunk, good news! Walmart sells a knock-off. You’re welcome.
4. Pop-Tarts Food Coloring Markers
This product is so obscure, I could only find one image of it on the internet. (Thanks, Pinterest). This photo is the only evidence that Pop-Tarts’ Food Coloring Markers actually existed outside our imaginations. If I recall, here’s how they worked: You could buy a box of Pop-Tarts with plain, white icing on the top—no sprinkles or decorative patterns. The edible markers were sold separately.
Lucky kids whose parents were willing to purchase two Pop-Tart products could draw on the blank Pop-Tarts to their little hearts’ content.
3. Crystal Pepsi
OK, yes—the launch of Crystal Pepsi is widely considered one of the biggest product flops of all time. But you know what? We don’t need that kind of negativity in our lives, thank you very much. The clear soda did actually make a comeback last year: Pepsi staged a multi-city tour (that featured Busta Rhymes, Sugar Ray’s Mark McGrath and Salt-N-Pepa) honoring the iconic drink and, for some reason, baseball. Sadly, the brand confirmed that Crystal Pepsi will never, ever return to shelves. Booooo, Pepsi.
2. Pizzaria Chips
We desperately miss Pizzaria Chips and, evidently, we’re not alone: There’s an entire movement dedicated to bringing the pizza-flavored chips back. It’s not a small crusade either— the “Bring back Pizzaria Chips made by Keebler” Facebook page has more than 3,500 followers.
“THERE IS A VOID IN ALL OUR LIVES,” according to the page’s description. “ONE THAT CAN ONLY BE FILLED BY A PIZZARIA CHIP. LETS (sic) MAKE THIS GROUP GROW TO SHOW KEEBLER THEY MUST BRING BACK THIS DELICIOUS SNACK.”
1. 3D Doritos
Fact: 3D Doritos are superior to all other Doritos. This is not up for debate.
The day they stopped making these was the day snack food died. If you don’t remember these, shame on you. They were one part Dorito, one part Bugle, and one part heaven.
According to this blog post, a version of the classic snack is still being produced in Mexico and you can buy it on eBay. It’s queso-flavored—not the nacho cheese flavor we know and love—but still, it exists and that’s something.
I feel that I can’t adequately express just how much we miss the original 3D Doritos. But this video (set to Evanescence’s “My Immortal”) definitely can. Enjoy.
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